Therapy For Low Self Esteem
I specialise in low self esteem and can help with feelings of self-doubt, constant comparison, seeking external validation - and the need to hide behind a mask. Available online and in Cambridge
Low Self Esteem
Can feel like:
You are a walk over and can’t stop people-pleasing
Constant comparisons, and feeling inferior to others, or dismissing them to feel better
Doubting or dismissing any positive feelings about yourself
Worrying too much what others think of you and feeling judged
Relying too much on external validation
Cognitive Analytic Therapy
For Low Self Esteem
Cognitive Analytic Therapy (CAT) views low self-esteem as stemming from dysfunctional patterns developed in response to challenging relationships or unmet emotional needs, often starting in childhood. These patterns, formed as coping mechanisms, become ingrained, leading to persistent feelings of inadequacy or worthlessness. A central concept in CAT is "reciprocal roles," learned from significant early relationships. For instance, growing up feeling unloved or criticized might lead to internalizing excessive self-criticism and compliance in relationships, reinforcing low self-esteem and creating a self-perpetuating cycle of negative self-perception.
EMDR
For Low Self Esteem
EMDR offers a complementary perspective, viewing low self-esteem as a consequence of unprocessed traumatic or distressing experiences. According to the Adaptive Information Processing (AIP) model, trauma can disrupt the brain's natural processing, leaving memories stored in a maladaptive state. These memories often carry negative self-beliefs, like "I am unworthy," contributing to low self-esteem. EMDR works to reprocess these memories, transforming the negative self-beliefs associated with them. As traumatic memories are processed, the negative self-beliefs shift, allowing individuals to develop a more positive self-concept and improve their self-esteem.
Compassion Focussed Therapy
For Low Self Esteem
Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT) addresses low self-esteem by helping individuals develop self-compassion and balance their inner emotional systems. CFT suggests that low self-esteem arises from an overactive "threat system," leading to harsh self-criticism, and an underdeveloped "soothing system," which makes it difficult to be kind to oneself. By cultivating self-compassion through mindfulness, recognizing shared humanity, and practicing self-kindness, individuals can reduce self-criticism, foster a more supportive inner dialogue, and ultimately improve their self-esteem and emotional resilience.
How do I feel better?
Integrating therapies provide an effective, supportive approach:
Understanding Patterns (CAT): Begin by exploring and mapping out the dysfunctional patterns and reciprocal roles that contribute to low self-esteem.
Processing Trauma (EMDR): Use EMDR to reprocess traumatic memories that have created or reinforced negative self-beliefs.
Cultivating Self Compassion (CFT): Develop a kind, compassionate perspective to observe patterns and create a more supportive inner dialogue.
Developing Healthy Patterns (CAT): After reprocessing, work on establishing healthier patterns of thinking and behaving, supported by the new, kind way of treating yourself.
Together, these approaches can help you break free from the cycle of low self-esteem, allowing you to build a more confident and positive self-image. By addressing both here-and-now coping, and the deeper, trauma-related roots of low self-esteem, you can achieve more lasting and meaningful change. Contact me today to book a free consultation.